God has put it on my heart for years and years that I really needed to open up and share. I always find an excuse. I always let that fear overcome me. I let those thoughts creep in that are obviously from the enemy. "No one will care" "what if people care too much and it blows up into a huge drama" "people will think your stupid" ECT. Hey, that may all be true. Every last bit of it. But this is not about all of you. Its about God. Its about what he has put on my heart. It's about me. Its about my healing and moving past the junk in my life. Its about my husband and my kids. Healing to be the best mom that I can possibly be and the best wife. And it's about that one person. The one who reads my words and knows that God sent me their way because I said something they needed to hear. Its about making everything we went through mean more than just heartache and pain. Its about letting God do what he does :) "And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them" Romans 8:28.
So here's the funny thing about this. One subject this morning pushed me over the edge and made me decide to just do it! Just sit down and start typing. Homelessness. I see so many people have this idea about the kinds of people that are homeless. And it's heartbreaking. But we'll come back to that. So I'm all ready to jump on this thing. Come on here and finally just start spilling it. I download this app. It asks me to sign in with my Google email. I do. And I see a post on there already. So I think "this must be a sample" I open it up and start reading. Nope. Its not a sample. Its a previous blog post that I wrote. One very similar to this. One talking about the things God has done in my life. Talking about my need to get my story out. So I've obviously been down this road before. I remember doing it. And I let someone read it. The response I got was "well there really isn't much there" It seems like a simple statement. But, at the time..it was enough to make me feel inadequate. Enough to make me not to want to continue. I'm sure some read that find it pathetic. But, that's how high my confidence was. And can still be at times. I know there are people out there that relate to that. So, I'm going to try not to give up this time. I'm going to try not to let what others think bring me down. This is one of the things the Lord is working on in me right now. "Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ."Galatians 1:10
I need to not focus on trying to please everyone, because I do that, a lot!
So, homelessness. Last year in 2016, we were homeless. To clarify "we" to those reading that do not know me, we are me, my husband, and our 5 kids. Plus our pets. Describing us, first and foremost, we are a Christian family. Believers in Jesus Christ. Second we are a military family. And third I would say we are a homeschool family. And last year we ended up homeless.
The stereotype I see and hear often, and I'm sure you have heard it, is homeless people are lazy drunk druggies. "Go get a job" is often hurled. That stereotype is FALSE. My husband, at the time, was an active duty marine. He had 13 years" 2 tours to Iraq and 2 other deployments under his belt. He was far from a lazy drunk,druggie. Nonetheless when we reached out for help, he was told to get a job. No one even asked who he REALLY was. WHY we needed help. Or what brought us to where we were. So what did my husband do? He got ANOTHER job.
You may be thinking to yourself...this is a special circumstance. This is not typical. Most people are lazy drunken druggies. You are WRONG. During the time we were homeless, and since then after, we have met SO many people with stories like ours. Yes that includes active duty military! It truly opened my eyes. It opened my husband's eyes. Because you know what? We had that stereotype in our head too. It was such a hard time. And I can say my faith was not as strong then. But I can see that God used our situation to grow us. To strengthen us, in him. "He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak." Isaiah 40:29 "For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength" Philippians 4:13
To show us things we otherwise would not have.
Next time, I'll get into what led up to us being homeless. So thanks for reading so far!!
P.S. Christmas is our most recent family pic!
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